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|Posted on 11 December, 2019 at 19:37||comments (72)|
October was intimate partner abuse month. I did not get a chance to write about it. So, I will now.
It is not OK. It is not OK to be abuse by anyone. There is never a justifiable reason to abuse someone. Abuse can be mental, physical, financial, emotional just to name a few types.
Many may feel like they have no choice but to stay in an abusive relationship. That is not true. Yes, it will or can be a little unsettling or scary. But, you have to keep in mind that you do not deserve to be abused. Abuse is about control. No adult has the right to abuse another adult. No adult has the right to control another adult.
To anyone that is in an intimate partner abuse relationship, get help. There is help available. Call this number: 1-800-799-7233. You can also chat on line at thehotline.org.
What is domestic partner abuse? Domestic violence (also called intimate partner violence (IPV), domestic abuse or relationship abuse) is a pattern of behaviors used by one partner to maintain power and control over another partner in an intimate relationship.
Here are some of the signs of domestic partner abuse:
Some of the signs of an abusive relationship include a partner who:
|Posted on 16 May, 2019 at 14:04||comments (55)|
One of the things I strive to do is address some of the many things that have an affect on the family. I address them from a Biblical stand point. Those that do not believe in God or have an issue with God and the Church many not find what I say helpful. But I will continue to do all I can to help the family and help our children.
One of the things I think about all the time is how God said to train up a child in the way they should go. When a child is born, they do not know anything. They come into this world as a blank slate. The only thing that will be 'written on that slate' is what the parent exposes the child to. Therefore, it is important for the parent to train the child in the way he or she should go.
Leaving a child alone to his or her own devices is not wise. A child does not have the maturity to choose what he or she should do or feel. The parent has to take the lead and teach/train the child.
Yes, there are obstacles. Yes, there are trials and hindrances. But it is still the responsibility of the parent to train the child.
I raised two children as a single parent. I know it can be done. Will it take sacrifice? Yes. Will it take a lot of time and energy? Yes.
I often tell young people, if you want to be free to do what you want when you want, do not have children. Once you have children, you have a God ordained responsibility to teach and train them.
"Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it." Proverbs 22:6
|Posted on 25 January, 2019 at 16:15||comments (169)|
I met an amazing lady this morning. She is 82 years and still driving and working at one of the largest department stores in the United States. Just talking with her reminded me of how blessed I am. She was so lively and grateful for her life.
Recently I had been praying to the Lord about some things. This amazing lady was used of God to give me some of my answers.
As you know, I believe in helping children be their best. Part of that includes teaching them things. In order to teach someone something, you have to have a foundation and material. My foundation for teaching children is the Lord and my material is the Bible wisdom.
Many no longer believe, rely or accept the Bible as a foundational tool to teach children. But it is. This amazing woman I met this morning told me of how she was raised and how things taught to her kept her and prepared her for life. She went on to tell me that her husband was in the military and lost his life due to the Vietnam War. She told me about the 'fire and brimstone' preaching she heard in her youth. She told me things she was taught helped make her strong.
I still believe in fire and brimstone preaching, even for the 'millennial's'.
The word of God declares to "train up a child in the way they should go". This still applies today. And, if you read a little further in the Bible in the New Testament, you will find Jesus saying, "I am the way, the truth and the light" (John 14:6).
God's way is still the best way and the right way. Our children need something and someone greater than themselves to help them maneuver through this world.
Take your children to Church. Ask God to lead you to one that teaches the Bible way. Yes, there are more 'bad' churches than good ones. But, there are still some good ones. Psychology and therapy does not change the heart. Mind mapping does not change the heart. God can and does still change hearts.
Jesus still loves the world (John 3:16). The real question is does the world love Jesus?
"But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven." Matthew 19:14
|Posted on 8 June, 2018 at 15:15||comments (38)|
As an advocate for marriage and the family, I would like to address the recent suicides that have occurred. No, I am not a mental health professional according to the standards of man. But I do know a God that is well nigh able to deliver and heal.
If you are struggling with yourself, life issues do not let the enemy back you in a corner and tell you no one cares and that you are alone. In addition to being a life coach and counselor, I am also an ordained minister of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I can speak from personal experience that the Lord Jesus Christ can heal and deliver. I was bound by so many things and felt trapped in my circumstances. Then someone told me about Jesus.
If you are need today, call the Church. The number is 210-262-3506. You may also call There is Hope at 210-601-5571. Please leave a message if there is no answer.
Do not allow depression, despair lead you to take your life. Get help!!
|Posted on 3 April, 2018 at 3:16||comments (78)|
A subject that is very dear to me is how and when children begin to use electronics. I am a firm believer that a child should not have access to a cell phone, lap top, tablet or television during the first 5 years of their lives. I know, it sound like a long time, but it is worth the wait for the child. The first five years of a child's life are the informative years. It is during this time that time should be spent helping the child learn to live without electronics.
A recent article I read stated the following: "over the past 15 years, researchers have been releasing alarming statistics on a sharp and steady increase in kids' mental illness, which is now reaching epidemic proportions:
1. 1 in 5 children has mental health problems
2. 43% increase in ADHA
3. 37% increase in teen depression
4. 200% increase in suicide rate in kids 10-14 years old"
The articles goes on to say, "children need to spend time with their parents and not an electronic device. Children are being deprived of the fundamentals of a healthy childhood, such as emotionally available parents, clearly defined limits and guidance, responsibilities, balanced nutrition and adequate sleep, movement and out doors and creative play, social interaction, opportunities for unstructured times and boredom."
Will follow up laater.
|Posted on 28 July, 2017 at 13:52||comments (34)|
I had a conversation with a lady the other day. During the conversation she spoke about how unruly children are today; yelling at parents, making demands, being disrespectful, being disobedient, how you can not tell them anything, and if you do the parents get offended.
i thought about what she said. And, she is right. Not all children, but too many than it should be.
I believe in training or teaching children right from wrong. According to the word of God, He said to train them up in the way they should go. A child should not be allowed to have control. The parent is the one with the God given authority and they should not relinquish it to a child. At no time is it ok for a child to be disobedient to parents (unless the parent is instructing the child to break the law or do something that will cause them harm). Parents should not get offended if some one within right, corrects their child. I raised two children alone. I needed the eyes of others to help me.
Children need structure. That structure should come from parents. And, I am not talking about enrolling in every sport available for their age group. I am talking about things like boundaries (what they can and can not do). If a parent allows a child to have everything they want, go wherever they want when they want, that parent is asking for trouble. There has to be a NO in there somewhere.
Why structure? Because in the real world, no one gets everything they want. In he real world, you are going to be told no. In the real world, your child is not going to be the only one that counts. Having structure helps build character.
Children must learn how to handle rejection in a constructive manner.
To the parents, take a look and see how you are doing. It really is ok to say, no.
|Posted on 21 December, 2016 at 18:04||comments (33)|
We had a Youth session earlier this year. In it, we discussed the six core skills a child needs to succeed. Here they are.
4. critical thinking
5. creative innovation
They need: the ability to wrok with others, to have social-emotional control, and to form communities. They need the ability to develop strong language skills, excellent listening skills, and strong reading and writing outcomes. The need competencies in subject areas but also in learning to learn. They need the ability to sift through information intelligently and to weigh evidence. They need the ability to useinformation in new ways to solve obvious and undefined problems. They need the ability to learn from failure, to persist in a problem and to have grit.
Something to think about.
|Posted on 2 November, 2016 at 19:04||comments (27)|
Yes, I know, everyone has one. Yes, I know, it is a necessity so some say. But I would like to challenge parents to not be so quick to buy a cell phone for minor children. I would like to challenge parents to spend more time with their children and not allow electronics to baby sit them.
Yes these are busy times. Yes, schedules are full and there does not seem to be enough time to do everything that needs to be done. But just think about it. A parent has one chance to instill the necessary values and proper ethics into a child. Use more of that time with your child. There are so many things the family can do together to build trust and love.
Just think about. It will be time well spent.
|Posted on 17 September, 2016 at 16:24||comments (31)|
Part of having a good marriage is to continue to work on your relationship with you spouse.
Respect for one another is very important. It sort of serves as a foundation for communication in the marriage. From the foundation of respect, lets add honesty.
Being hones with each other can sometimes be hard. Being honest means having to tell the truth about how you feel. For some, this is not easy.
But, work on it. Work on being respectful to your mate. Work on being honest with one another.
There is Hope
|Posted on 26 July, 2016 at 17:59||comments (95)|
Man that is born of a woman is but a few days and those days are full of trouble. You do not have to go looking for trouble. Trouble will find you. But do not give up.
Husbands, wives, children, family.....do not give up. Relationships go through changes. Why? Because the people involved change and grow. As one matures likes and dislikes change, habits change. Change is part of relationships. Do not give up.
Sometimes you need a safe place to talk, discover the root cause of your feelings or what you are going through. Find a trusted friend, Pastor, family member that you can talk real talk to that you can confide in. The Lord has so much in store for you. Do not give up. Your family is worth fighting for.